Simply
as ABC your a snob
There was a time when it was #cool to hate Justin Bieber.
"That little shit," you said when you heard he peed in a restaurant's
mop bucket in 2013. "Who does
that," you wondered as you heard the 2014 tale of his monkey being left
overseas. You hated him with the entire world and made it a point to hate
him on principle. And then Purpose came. You desk-bopped to "What Do You
Mean" and you totally watched the video a few times. You thought:
"Wait. I can't believe I'm saying this, but … I think I love Justin
Bieber."
It didn't end there. You went on Facebook. You posted
"Sorry." You captioned it "I can't believe I'm doing this, but
I'm literally obsessed with this song." You got drunk and went out that
weekend and when you heard the new Bieber you were all "hahahaha he's such
an asshole but I loveeeeeee thissssss!" You sang hard and unabashedly. You
sobered up. You listened again the next morning. You danced pants-less in your
apartment and told everyone about it the next day — you finished your story
with "What is happening
to me?"
I, Belieber of seven full
years, can see right through you. What you care about, fair-weather
Belieber, is what other people think. You're probably what they call a
"music snob." The type who liked Taylor Swift when she was burgeoning
and really angry, but jumped ship the second your friend heard
"Teardrops on My Guitar" on the radio and asked if you'd heard of "that
super hot new country star." The type who genuinely likes music from
another era (great! Seriously!) but talks about it incessantly because
you're more serious about
music than other people (ugh! Bro!). Music is music is music and,
honestly, you've probably been a closeted Belieber since "Baby."
Regardless, it doesn't take a music critic to see Justin is going through something right now. He's been walking around big cities barefoot, sitting on benches alone, and asking his fans — who he always makes sure to vocalize his appreciation for — to back TF off
while he's doing these sad things in public. These instances are very
different than the ones that originally made you hate him. I wonder now
that you've decided you love Justin, person who needed Skrillex's
permission to enjoy pop music, if you're going to go right back to
denying it, claiming you knew he was an asshole this whole time. Are you
going to tweet stupid "it's too late to say sorry now hahaha" jokes
while he's having a rough time? Or are you going to just let the kid be
and enjoy an album he clearly put his heart into?
You
don't have to be a fan of someone to love what he does. In this case, I
am and I do, but just because you have an issue with Justin, a young
man, who, let me remind you, grew up very publicly and made some of the
same mistakes you too made as a teen, does not mean you have to shame
him constantly. In fact, your constant denouncement of him takes away
from the fun of the music in the first place. Literally no one cares if
you hate Robin Thicke, for example — OK, fine, we all hate Robin Thicke
— they just want to listen to "Blurred Lines" without being reminded of
it.
While we're at it, let's talk about how you can't stand Anne Hathaway but are the first to admit — she did deserve that Oscar! And let's discuss how you don't condone the Hot Felon's popularity, but you do think
he's super hot. Personally, I thought Dane Cook was funny when I was in
middle school, even though I know now he's an asshole. Literally, do
you even care that I think that? Of course not. It's so boring!
The
truth is, if you talk about how you "can't believe" you're a fan of
something, you sound like a total drag (not to mention pretty insecure
in your tastes). But go ahead: continue to justify your love of Justin
in an effort to pretend like the fever hasn't seeped its way deep, deep
down into your soul. Whatever works for ü.
No comments:
Post a Comment